The one I love

Many of my friends asked me whether I have some one special or not.The funny things, they did not believe whatever my answer to them :) May be because if I said 'no', it looks impossible, cause how can some one like me, do not have boy friend at all. And if I said 'yes', they always saw me, went alone.

 

 

Actually, I have some one that I love and (he said) loves me too. What kind of our relationship, how often we meet, etc, uhm ... let it just my and his secreet. Same like the question, where I and he will bring this relationship. I just know, that until now, I have him. I do not know the future, I am not a fortune teller :D I am trying my best for this relationship and if something going wrong, I will not regret too.

 

 

If then,  you ask me if I want to marry him. I will tell you, clearly, YES. But if you ask me if he wants to marry me, uhm... I don't know. We never talk seriously about it. Or may be one day I will ask him and wish his anwer yes too. And if you ask me why I trust him, I think because he trust me too. Because I love him, I should have more positive thinking about him, right? One or two times, may be I feel jealous, but I am trying hard to stop my bad thingking. Que sera - sera, what ever will be, just will be. I have my God always by me.

 

 

Through him, I learn to be a strong, to be a brave, to trust people. He was there when I was in my lowest point and he is there too when I reached my dreams. He always believe me that I can do when people did not think that I be able to do that. He trusted me when people thought that they could not trust me. With him around me, I can feel that I am the most beautiful woman in this world.

Uhm ... so please wish me luck :D

Stop thingking, start loving

A few days ago, I read the good time line at twitter 'stop thinking, start loving'. I bet partof us, always think a lot before we brave enough to say and to show love. And the funny think that we are braver to say and show hate. Yup, it's happen to me too :D

I never think first if I get angry to someone, I will say directly to them about my anger and I am brave enough to take a risk if someone get angry to me when I show or say them when I hate or angry to them. But different with saying something name "love", I feel scare that I have to take a risk, rejected by someone because of love that I show or say to them. So before I show or say, in my mind always show me a nightmare about how someone loose his/her dignity because of rejected some one.

And now because of the tag line which I read before, I should do the reverse. More brave to show or to say my love. If they are rejected or try to hide me or do not want to be my friend anymore because of that, that is their problem. As long as I did not do something worse to them, or as long as I did not force me to love me the same way I love them, and as long as I just want to give love not ask for the return, I think I can't be the bad person because I give love to some one, right? :D

And I should re think again and again before I talk about anger, hate or any bad things to some one, especially if they close enough to me. Because actually, it will hurt them and if I were them, might be I would be hurt too. I do not want to have many enemies in my life.

And if some one that I do not love say that they love me. I will do same like I alwaysdo before, I will not reject them, will not hate them, but tell them the truth that that is my honor to get love from them, but I love them in a different ways. Of course I still want to be their friend, as long as they want to. But if they thought that they could not accept it, it is ok for me. As long as their happy. Just tell them, please don't hate me, because of different love that I have to them.

And I think if we have much loves in this world. We want to do like a child, justshow love without much thinking, may be there will be no war in this world anymore. Like anothers wise words said : stop war, make love :-)

With a lot of loves.